KK's Korner

No telling what’s being thought of in the mind of a lunatic

“Road Rage” Is A Bad Signal For Me

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Normally I am a pretty laid-back driver, but over the last few months I have been suffering from so-called road rage. I can’t help it. It’s not the fact some asshole cuts me off almost plows into my car. What pisses me off is their blatant disregard for almost damaging the vehicle I’m in. One thing that really pisses me off is when you’re in front of a large vehicle going up a hill. The truck has its blinkers on and is in the right-hand lane going 20 mph. That’s fine and dandy; I have no problem with this. However, when I put on my turn signal to change lanes, I almost always wait an extra second because I know that the asshole behind me is going to try and zoom around me instant I start to merge in another lane. I can’t begin to count the number of times people would have slammed into my car’s bumper had I not been the cautious one.

Oh I fucking hate those people. If I’m driving the better half’s car, a 2004 cavalier, I practice my “careful pause” before switching lanes because this vehicle is our household’s primary mode of transportation. But if I’m driving my ’88 Corsica that already has one wheel in the junkyard, I say “fuck you’ and go into the other lane regardless, making the dickhead behind me have to slam on their brakes or swerve back into the right-hand lane. Fuck you bitch. If you would have put on your goddamn turn signal when this all began, I’d have no problem; I’d even let you pass me even though I put my turn signal on first. Some people need to be taken out to a nearby field and shot.

As much as this sort of thing happens to me, I’m glad to know I’m not alone. One place I hate driving in is the grocery store parking lot. Christ, that place is a land mine with cars pulling out every which way. This is why I always park near the back of the local grocery store’s parking lot, even when it’s only half-full. And I was reminded today why I do this.

I was walking to this store and I went in front of this old guy with a huge Buick backing out. The reason I chose to walk in front of his car was because I know better than to be behind a senior citizen when they’re in reverse. Unfortunately, this yuppie mini-van didn’t know this rule, and the old guy almost plowed into this poor lady driving the vehicle. What made me laugh about the whole thing is that there was no way that mini-van was in any blind spot; she was directly behind the Buick. I guess when you reach a certain age you just don’t care about accumulating points on your driver’s license.

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Written by kkktookmybabyaway

February 28, 2006 at 9:42 pm

Posted in Life

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