KK's Korner

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Archive for December 2009

Top 20 Stories In My Redneck Of The Woods

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So my community fishwrap not only did a Top 10 stories of the year for my township, but one for the adjacent neo-hick community. Surely such hard-hitting topics as Sonic trying to build a store in the region and a borough’s only (part-time) police officer resigning due to tension with council over him waiting outside fire halls to arrest drunks who get in their vehicles could have been combined into one grandiose chronicling event.

Don’t believe me? Here you go:

From my township:

10: Township parks and recreation director named.
9: Memorial dedicated at park for soldier.
8: Election gives GOP slight majority to township board of commissioners for the first time in forever.
7: Township manager leaves.
6: Township commissioner’s residency questioned. (Hey, if President Hussein doesn’t have to prove his residency, why should this guy?)
5: Sonic tries again to set up shop.
4: Community center closes.
3: Two men charged with murdering a pregnant 21-year-old.
2: Wal-Mart tries to set up shop (and take over the world).
1: Flood hits area. Here’s the lead, “The region was devastated by what some emergency managment officials called a “100-year storm” on June 17 and left to fend for itself after being denied financial assistance by FEMA twice. (Hey, and our county is predominately white? What gives?)

Now here are the top 10 stories from my nearby township:

10: Crime watch established.
9: Fire truck replaced.
8: Crappy closed-down one-screen (or is it two-screen?) theater renovation project delayed.
7: Mayor retires after 50-year career.
6: Police chief retires, no replacement sought.
5: Two of four part-time members of street department axed.
4: Proposal to reverse street directions … reversed. (Don’t ask, it’s that stupid.)
3: Police officer resigns. (See my first paragraph for details.)
2: Cooking fire burns down shithole motel. (It also was the reason for Story #8.)
1: Sewer separation project destroys “Main Street.” Here’s the blurb:

The year was marred by torn up streets and detours in downtown Irwin as the borough struggled through the (DEP) Department of Environmental Protection-mandated sewer separation project.

Some business owners said the project, which started last December, chased customers out of downtown, calling it their “Irwin nightmare.”

Engineer Lucien Bove said contractors ran into a tangled mess of pipes that, in some spots, were as deep as 16 feet below the street. Each pipe, he said, had to be tested and identified.

Even with a $400,000 grant from the county and a $750,000 PennVEST grant, the project forced the borough to incur a $5.5 million debt to bring the sewers up to DEP standards.

Contractors will be back in the spring to restore pavements on the borough’s streets, including a curb-to-curb repaving of Main Street.

Basically, this clusterfuck has destroyed “downtown” Irwin. God only knows how the remaining businesses are staying open. Earlier this year, when business owners were bitching about the slow construction pace, some public official said that the owners needed to better operate their stores. What a joke.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 31, 2009 at 4:18 pm

Posted in Life

New Year, Same Old Resolutions

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So a new year is upon us. Yay. That means one thing: RESOLUTIONS.

Why do we like resolutions? Sure they’re stupid and we never accomplish losing weight or saving money, but each new year means a new calendar and a seemingly “fresh start” that will probably get tainted by Martin Luther King Jr. Day. I’m not one for resolutions, but I do like to spend late December/early January reflecting for a bit and seeing where I am and where I need to go.

In 2009 I decided to do the following lifestyle changes. How did I do?

— Eat better. Mission Accomplished, sans late November/December.

— Exercise more. Mission Accomplished.

— Pay off an extra $1500 in principal toward the mortgage. Mission Accomplished, sans November/December.

Not bad. Not bad at all. And January 1 brings on a new calendar, which means an opportunity to start a new year in which I will keep on exercising, eating better and contributing to a premature mortgage payoff.

Now what do I plan on doing for 2010?

— Bringing my older KK’s Korner content over to this place. I’ve been saying this for a half-year now and it’s time to get my ass in gear.

— Converting my CDs and tape into MP3 format. Five down, several hundred to go. Ugh.

— Keeping the house tidy. Mrs. kkk and I recently did a thorough cleaning of the house, and each time we accomplish such a task I vow not to shit up the house again. Of course, this is always easier said than done. However, not only is it a new year but it’s a new decade. Things can change, can’t they?

We’ll see, but if I fail I can always say, “Well the REAL decade doesn’t start until 2011 because of the ‘there was no Year Zero.'” But most of those people who bring up this logic are smarmy assholes.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 30, 2009 at 5:03 pm

Posted in Life

Betting The House This Payment Won’t Go Through

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I swear to Christ that Bank of America doesn’t want my mortgage payments anymore. Why? Their online bill pay feature hasn’t worked right ever since this place took over my mortgage AND nobody in the customer service department can find my account. I didn’t have any problems paying my mortgage online for more than five years, but now I have had to call customer service for the last two payments. I think the highlight came when I spent five minutes playing the phone directory tree game only to get, “Your call did not go through,” and getting cut-off.


On the bright side, if I stop paying my mortgage, I’m sure Bank of America wouldn’t know how to reach me.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 29, 2009 at 5:13 pm

Posted in Life

Is That A Bomb In Your Pants Or Are You Just Happy To Jihad?

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An underwear bomb? That would hurt like hell.

A singed pair of underwear with a packet of powder sewn into the crotch, seen in government photos obtained exclusively by ABC News, is all that remains of al Qaeda’s attempt to down an American passenger plane over Detroit.

As seen in these photos, the alleged bomb consisted of a packet of powder sewn into the briefs of Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, a 23-year-old Nigerian. Al Qaeda took credit Monday for the attempted bombing, boasted of its ability to overcome U.S. intelligence and airport security, and promised new attacks.

The first photo, to the left, shows the slightly charred underpants with the bomb packet still in place. All photos include a ruler to provide scale.

Who the hell would agree to this? And how exactly does an Al Qaeda recruiter manage to convince someone that this is a good idea? What use would be all those virgins in the afterlife if the bomber’s junk was ground zero?

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 28, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Posted in News

This State’s Top Stories Are A Real Gem

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So I just read an article on the top 10 Idaho-related stories of 2009. I have no idea why I’m obsessed with this state so much. With that said, anyone who says they liked Napoleon Dynamite automatically goes down a notch (or three) in my Book of Awesomeness, which is where I track such things.

Here are the stories that topped the Gem State in case you are a Spud-oholic like me:

More than 33,000 jobs lost, millions of dollars cut from the state budget and foreclosures peppering neighborhoods across the state—many Idaho residents spent 2009 hoping and praying for better times ahead.

The economic crisis touched nearly every aspect of life in Idaho, reaching into public school classrooms, local housing markets, the halls of the Statehouse and the courts to become the biggest news story of 2009.

Still, hopes are high that economic recovery could be the story of 2010: Idaho’s chief economist Mike Ferguson said earlier this month that Idaho’s non-farm employment showed a slight uptick in jobs in November. Ferguson said if the trend holds, it could mean the state has hit rock bottom and can begin to look for a path out of the HUSSEIN recession.

Here are the other top stories of 2009 chosen by The Associated Press:

Idaho soldier missing in Afghanistan:

The news began July 2 as a cryptic U.S. military announcement: An Army private was in Taliban hands after walking off his base in eastern Afghanistan. No name was released, officials said, to protect the soldier.

On July 17, however, the frightened face of Bowe Bergdahl, from tiny Hailey, Idaho, became familiar to the world after Taliban militants released a video of 23-year-old. Residents of Hailey adorned Main Street trees with yellow ribbons. Their message: “Bring Bowe Home.”

In mid-December, the Taliban’s media arm announced it would release a new video of a captive U.S. soldier. So far, however, no video has emerged publicly.

Public wolf hunts:

Idaho was joined by Montana in opening the first gray wolf hunts in the lower 48 states after the animal was removed from the endangered list across much of the Northern Rockies. Gray wolves once ranged from Alaska to Mexico, but hunting, trapping and government-sponsored poisoning wiped out the species across most of the lower 48 states by the 1930s. The animals were listed as endangered in 1974, and didn’t return to the region in significant numbers until 66 Canadian wolves were relocated to Idaho and Wyoming in the mid-1990s.

Idaho’s efforts to allow the animals to be hunting spawned federal lawsuits, but despite the legal battles the season opened Sept. 1 with a quota of 220 wolves.

The acquittal of Robert Aragon:

The trial of an Idaho man who let his two young children walk several miles in freezing conditions along an isolated rural highway last Christmas Day unfolded in October. Robert Aragon was driving his daughter, Sage, 11, and son, Bear, 12, to see their mother for the holidays when his car slid into the snow bank. The children started walking, but Sage did not survive the snowy trek. Aragon was charged in the death of Sage and for allowing Bear to suffer hypothermia. Aragon was acquitted after less than five days of testimony.

The murder of Robert Manwill:

A mother and her boyfriend pleaded for help after an Idaho boy went missing this summer, resulting in what Boise police called the largest search for a missing person in the city’s history. Thousands of residents helped look for 8-year-old Robert Manwill, whose body was found more than a week later in an irrigation canal. His mother, Melissa Jenkins and her boyfriend, Daniel Ehrlick, each are charged with first-degree murder. The trial has been scheduled for April 2010. Defense attorneys have asked a judge to hold separate trials for the two, and move the proceedings.

Nellis and UI:

Duane Nellis, who cited too little money when he turned down an offer to become the University of Idaho’s president, took the job in April after the state Board of Education sweetened the deal. The board agreed to waive a policy prohibiting multiyear contracts and the use of private funds to supplement the salaries of university presidents, giving Nellis a three-year contract and annual base salary of $335,000. Of that, $37,000 came from the university’s foundation. The board later extended multiyear contracts to the presidents of Idaho’s other four-year institutions.

Football Frenzy:

A turnaround season for the University of Idaho football team was topped off with the Vandals’ first bowl game in more than a decade, and in their home state. The Vandals (7-5) were invited to play Bowling Green in the Humanitarian Bowl on Dec. 30. The teams will square off on the blue turf at Boise State, where the Broncos dominated again this year and earned another trip to a big-money bowl. No. 6 Boise State (13-0) will play No. 3 TCU in the Fiesta Bowl on Jan. 4.

Tamarack saga:

French-born resort entrepreneur Jean-Pierre Boespflug pushed Tamarack Resort in 2004 as the first all-season U.S. vacation getaway in a quarter-century. After defaulting on a $250 million construction loan to a lender group led by Zurich-based Credit Suisse Group, however, Boespflug’s project 90 miles north of Boise runs the risk of another enduring legacy: The first major ski resort to go completely bust since a Colorado project folded its tent in 1974.

Lifts at Tamarack will be idle this winter; in December, Bank of America filed papers in U.S. Bankruptcy Court, its latest bid to repossess ski lifts.

Pam and politics:

Fired Idaho Transportation Department Director Pam Lowe launched a counterattack when she sued the state in November, alleging she was forced out illegally after refusing to buckle to demands by Gov. C.L. “Butch” Otter’s aides not to cut a highway contract with companies that are among his biggest campaign contributors. Lowe, the department’s first female director ever, also said she was a victim of gender discrimination.

Otter has since said he backed Lowe’s ouster, not because she was making life tough on his political friends, but because she’d lost the confidence of his office and of the Idaho Legislature.

Prison problems:

Idaho’s prisons were plagued with problems in 2009, kicking off the year with a riot that destroyed a prison warehouse. The department remodeled the warehouse into a cellblock so that 300 inmates that were being held in expensive out-of-state prisons could be brought back to Idaho. But some of the inmates rioted, destroying the building and leaving the state with no other choice but to overcrowd the prison, violating a long-standing court ruling against inhumane treatment of inmates.

The state also had to defend itself against lawsuits brought by several inmates—many of them housed at the privately run Idaho Correctional Center—contending that guards failed to protect them from gang members. A federal judge consolidated the cases and then partially dismissed them, but some of the inmates’ cases are proceeding. A review of hundreds of documents by The Associated Press showed the private prison had a dramatically higher rate of inmate-on-inmate assaults compared with the state-run facilities in the state.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 28, 2009 at 3:48 pm

Posted in News

Top KK’s Korner Searches For 12/27/09

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I haven’t done one of these in a while. Let’s see what’s putting butts in the seats for the end of 2009.

touch my girl belly button
belly button finger
girls playing belly button games
boy belly button
girls belly buttons

You know, I almost regret posting the entry that is causing all of this.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 27, 2009 at 5:51 pm

Posted in Top Searches

California Keeps Abreast Of Federal Task Force Recommendations

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What’s the big deal? That expert federal task force said most women should wait until they’re 50 years old before getting routine mammograms. With the budget issues facing California, why shouldn’t the state try to … ahem … ration health care to those that REALLY need it?

The dollars saved are nearly negligible, but the political costs of scaling back breast cancer screening for tens of thousands of low-income women have turned out to be huge.

Twenty-one members of California’s congressional delegation — Republicans and Democrats alike — have sent a letter rebuking the governor for the move, and state lawmakers are warning that people will die. Audits are being demanded. “Diagnosis delayed leads to death,” said Assemblyman Pedro Nava, a Democrat from Santa Barbara.

At issue is an early December decision by the Schwarzenegger administration to stop providing free breast cancer screening for those younger than 50 and to freeze new enrollments for six months starting in the new year. The changes inject a “cruel level of confusion,” Nava said, for poor women seeking breast exams in the Every Woman Counts program, which served 311,000 in the 2008-09 fiscal year.

“This is unacceptable,” a bipartisan congressional group wrote to Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger this month. Eliminating free screenings, they warned, was “ultimately placing more women at risk of dying from breast cancer.”

About 1.2 million women are eligible for the program, advocates say, though far fewer receive the free mammograms. Single women earning up to $21,600 per year can sign up. The income limit for a woman in a family of four is $44,100.

The new rules are being written fewer than two months after a federal task force released a controversial opinion recommending that most women wait until age 50 to receive routine mammograms, and then get them once every two years. Administration officials said the changes to Every Woman Counts have nothing to do with those guidelines.

The hot-button issue of curtailing free mammograms for the poor has resonated from Sacramento to Washington. The 21 California members of Congress decried the cutbacks of the partly federally funded $61 million program as “penny unwise and pound foolish.”

Boy I sure can’t wait until all of this is FREE.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

December 27, 2009 at 5:48 pm

Posted in News