KK's Korner

No telling what’s being thought of in the mind of a lunatic

Archive for January 18th, 2010

Breaking New Year’s Resolutions Right On Target

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So earlier today I was at Target and noted that in the store’s seasonal section, right next to all the New Year’s get-in-shape-for-2010 stuff, there were several employees setting up Valentine’s Day chocolate/candy displays.

Now that I think about it, why DO we give chocolate and candy to our lady friends just a month and change after many of them make New Year’s resolutions to fit in that two-piece swim suit by June? Say, I think I just found a kick-ass excuse…

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Written by kkktookmybabyaway

January 18, 2010 at 9:16 pm

Posted in Life

Can’t We All Just Get Along?

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So yesterday I opened up the USA Weekend insert thingy in my Sunday fishwrap and found this stupid “How Open Minded Are You?” quiz. Oh this will be fun.

Answer each question with a score of 1 to 5, with 1 meaning never, 3 sometimes and 5 always. Simple enough.

1. When I hear a point of view that opposes mine, I keep an open mind, listen with empathy, ask the person to elaborate and try to understand his point of view.

My score is 2. Problem is I don’t give a shit what other people think. I usually like asking the “why” question after someone tries to make a point, but that’s because of my phat interviewing skillz. I don’t listen with an open mind. I hear your opinion. Yay. Unless it’s a VERY RARE instance, I don’t give a rat’s ass what you think. I also hope you feel the same about me.

2. When I hear an opposing viewpoint, I can express it so well that the person tells me he thinks I understand, even if I don’t agree.

My score is 4. If I may go back up to the previous question, I know most of the time why somebody thinks the way they do. A few weeks ago my assistant was talking about the Muslim Wookie Fucker and how he’s disappointed her in a number of ways. I asked why. She gave her reasons and that was that. I disagreed with a lot of what she thought were charming qualities about the Non-Dialect Negro, but I knew why she felt the way she did. And I didn’t say anything detrimental to her opinions. After all, I was on a fact-finding mission, not looking for an argument. OK, now I’m getting off course.

3. I value and appreciate the chance to work with people who have different perspectives and backgrounds.

My score is 1. I don’t give a fuck about your perspective and background. I want to work with people who get the job done. I’m only on the third question, but I’m willing to bet this is the worst question of the lot. Good God, what a stupid fucking question. I’ve been told more times than once that, “you need to learn to work with others.” My response? “Well those others need to learn how to work.” Never got a response each time after I lobbed that rocket.

4. I am open to learning new knowledge and skills from others, and I actively seek out diverse opinions.

My score is 3. I won’t hesitate to suck up game from someone, but I don’t “actively seek out diverse opinions.” I’ll meet this question in the middle.

5. I accept that two people can disagree and they both can be right — and that they still can get along with each other.

My score is 4. I think the first part of this question is a bit of gobbledygook, but I don’t necessarily disagree with it. And I fully agree with getting along. Shit, most of the people I’ve known during the course of my life have been the political opposite of me and we get/got along great. As long as you know you’re not going to change the mind of the other person, and as long as you don’t get butthurt over any insults, then there’s no problem.

6. People I live and work with will say I respectfully share my opinions without being offensive.

My score is 2. I’m an asshole. Because of this I keep my mouth shut at work.

7. When disagreements or tension arise in a relationship, I do my best to try to find a solution that will be beneficial to both of us.

My score is 2. I don’t find a solution that will be “beneficial” to both of us. I find a solution that’s right. There have been times in the past when the better half was dead wrong on something and versa vice. I didn’t look for a mutually beneficial solution. If I was wrong I was wrong. If Mrs. kkk was wrong then she was wrong. Why do I roll like this? Because when a situation pops up in with the better half is TOTALLY in the right, and I support her, she knows my feelings are genuine and that makes her stand her ground that much more — at least until she starts feeling guilty.

8. I look for role models who can best help me to learn respect and admiration for others.

My score is 1. Fuck role models.

9. I am open to new experiences and am willing to try new things (such as new food, music, cultural activities, etc.).

My score is 2. The only thing I could say I try is music. I’m indifferent to food. Cultural activities? LOL.

10. I try to be good-humored, even in difficult situations.

My score is 4. If you can’t laugh at yourself you can’t laugh at others.

FINAL SCORE: 25

So how well do you get along with others?

45-50 Excellent. You should be commended. You have a significant respect for and appreciation of the differences in others.

40-44 Very good. Although you show a healthy amount of respect for others and their point of view, you could work to improve your skills to be even better.

30-39 Fair to good. You generally keep an open mind, but you still have trouble in some instances.

10-29: Poor. You tend to be closed to the differences in others. You need to work on having an open mind.

Want to know the best part of this retarded quiz?

Mrs. kkk scored 22.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

January 18, 2010 at 8:53 pm

Posted in Life