KK's Korner

No telling what’s being thought of in the mind of a lunatic

Archive for February 13th, 2010

One (Dol)Phun Game Title

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OK, I’m now in the groove with talking about games that drove me up the f’n wall.

Entry 1.

Entry 2.

Here’s Entry 3.

Back in my Atari 2600 days there was this Activision game called “Dolphin.”

Long story short: You were a dolphin. A squid was after you. These sonar waves/currents would come across the screen, warning you of an upcoming seahorse wall. Depending on the pitch of the wave, you would be told where the wall opening would be located. Once the squid/horses changed color, the mighty seagull would appear and if you touched it the hunter (squid) becomes the hunted.

Confused? Here you go.

For an Atari 2600 game, it was pretty damn good. However, there was something else. If you earned at least 80,000 points and sent a photo of your score to Activision, you would get some hippie patch. There was also another “secret” high score that, if achieved, you could take a picture and send to Activision. You would then get the uber-dolphin patch.

Now back in my day we didn’t have this thing called the Internet, so I had no idea what this message was. And I wanted to unlock this secret message BAD. There were many days when my frustration would boil over in an attempt to unlock this super-secret code. As a kid I remember gnawing on the Atari joystick when I got pissed, and I’m sure many a toothmark was left on that controller because of this stupid game. Eventually I just gave up — or got a newer video game system.

Years went by and I was in college. For whatever reason I hooked up my Atari system and played this game for old time’s sake. Something happened.

I wasn’t dying.

Holy crap. I looked up and I realized that my score was pretty darn high. NOW the pressure was on. I was well over 50,000 points and hadn’t died once. Now that I realized that my childhood dream was a possibility, the pressure was on. Naturally, I lost a life soon thereafter. And another. And…

…maybe another one. But that was it.

I beat the game!!!

There I was. A young adult. Sitting Native American-style in front of my small, crappy television in my old bedroom looking in amazement at the fact I picked up game I hadn’t played in at least a decade and beat it just like that. What was the final message?

Hell, I can’t remember.

I did a Google search and found this.

If this works for you, then it works for me.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

February 13, 2010 at 10:37 pm

Posted in Entertainment

Trapped Too Far In The Show To See The Celebrity

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Well this shows how freakin’ dense I am.

I DVR the block of OMGFAUXNEWSLOL2010 “Cost of Freedom” shows. No, that doesn’t show my density. Well, maybe it does, but that’s not the point. These shows are just a bunch of people going blahblahblah, talk about how awful the country is faring then give some CAN’T MISS stock tips. It entertains me. What can I say?

Anyway, one of the shows, “Cashin’ In,” features a regular panelist named Wayne Rogers. This week’s edition had another panelist talking about this year’s Super Bowl and it’s ratings conquest of the MASH series finale. A remark was made about how this was “Wayne’s MASH.”

Huh? Wayne Rogers was on MASH?

*Goes on Wikipedia.*

Wha-? He was TRAPPER JOHN?

I’ve been watching this show for years and I never realized that was Trapper John. Holy cow.

And of course the person who made the MASH-Super Bowl reference was John Layfield…

…the ex-professional wrestler.

Sad thing is, I didn’t need Wikipedia to know this one.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

February 13, 2010 at 10:03 pm

Posted in Entertainment

A Wedding Surprise Unveiled

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OK, so maybe this could be one of the worst things you can do to a Muslim male. (Or just about any guy, for that matter.)

An Arab ambassador called for an instant divorce after discovering his veil-wearing fiancee had a beard and was cross-eyed, it emerged today.

The would-be bride had hidden her face behind a Muslim niqab throughout their short courtship, meaning the diplomat had no idea what she looked like.

But as soon as the marriage was contract was signed in Dubai, in the United Arab Emirates, he tried to kiss her, before coming face-to-face with her hairy face and strange squint.

‘He was absolutely horrified,’ said a wedding guest.

‘The bride had a nice personality, but there was a good reason why she was hiding her looks behind a veil.

‘A divorce was inevitable, and the groom went straight to court leaving his new bride in floods of tears.’

The unnamed ambassador, who is in his 40s and has worked all over the world, including in Paris, told an Islamic Sharia court that he was tricked into the arranged marriage, Dubai’s official government newspaper reported.

He claimed the woman’s parents sent his own mother and and father pictures of her far more attractive sister.

A legal source said: ‘Every time the couple met, the bride would do her best hide her entire face.

‘The woman, who is a physician, was very keen to marry him, as she had had very few suitors, even though she’s well into her 30s.’

Lawyers for the ambassador successfully called for the marriage to be annulled, but his demand for £100,000 to cover the cost of the wedding reception was rejected, following the conclusion of the case on Tuesday.

He had spent the money on food, drink, wedding cars and jewellery.

The ambassador’s legal team also made an application for the woman to be examined for hormonal deficiencies, but when she went to see a doctor nothing out of order was found.

‘She’s devastated by the entire experience,’ added the source.

(Fast forward to 1:47-2:13 for the desired effect.)

Hey, at least he didn’t stone her. That’s progress.

Sure there’s that old saying, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” However, do you purchase a car before giving it a test-drive?

One other note: This chick’s a doctor but the guy just flees the scene because of her looks. Shows what guys think about when it comes to courting the opposite sex. Then again, millions of women (and men) do the ol’ “here’s a ‘real’ picture of me” game all the time on the Internet.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

February 13, 2010 at 12:38 pm

Posted in News

A Haunting Gaming Experience

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So a while back I talked about Ninja Gaiden for the NES and my experience with trying to beat this bloody thing. In this entry I mentioned that I might talk about some other games I had a bitch of a time beating. Might as well add another one to this list.

Ghouls ‘n Ghosts.

I had this game for the Sega Genesis. (Actually I still have it in some container somewhere in the kkk manor.) Remember my entry about almost failing 8th grade? Playing this game nonstop had something to do with this.

This was a hard game.

The premise was simple. You’re a knight. Some bad guy got your bitch. You can figure the rest out. Here’s the game in a nutshell.

You go through a graveyard and up some hill.

Then against some turtles of doom and fire things.

You then get to my favorite stage. Loved the music. Loved the pace. Hated it when I would pick up the firewater weapon by mistake.

Afterward, it’s through some crystal mine and sliding floors.

Finally, you’re in the castle of doom. (Note: Pause this video at 3:15 before reading on.)

Now while this person made it through the game in just over 10 minutes, let’s just say it’s A LOT HARDER playing this game for the first time. My God. But here was the best part.

After you defeated the Castle Boss, you were then informed that you had to go back and play this game all over again in order to reach the Big Boss. You see. You needed some hippie weapon to truly beat the Big Boss, and this weapon could only be acquired after going through all this shit a SECOND TIME. Oh you can imagine my joyous reaction upon finding this out for the first time. I think I actually called my friend a few houses down and shot off a round of cuss words upon making this discovery.

Eventually I did get to the final boss.

I have to admit, this is a pretty damn good ending. Was this ending worth all the aggravation I endured in getting there? Probably not.

Was it worth almost failing a grade level at school? Hey, I passed.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

February 13, 2010 at 4:21 am

Posted in Entertainment

Murder Story Makes Me Reflect

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This incident took place not far from me. The hell is wrong with people?

The family of Jennifer Daugherty say there was no reason for the torture and death of the 30-year-old Pennsylvania woman. Daugherty was gentle and trusting, they say, but also was especially vulnerable because she had the mental abilities of a 12 or 14 year old.

Police found her body Thursday stuffed into a garbage can in a Greensburg school parking lot in western Pennsylvania. They say she was forced to consume detergent and urine—and to write a fake suicide note—before she was fatally stabbed by attackers who also shaved her head and painted her face with nail polish.

Six people have been arrested, including people Daugherty considered her friends.

Police won’t discuss a motive.

When this story broke earlier this week, I couldn’t understand who in the hell would stuff a body in a garbage can and put it in a school parking lot. Then again, for this group of geniuses who (allegedly) committed the torture/murder and thought putting a suicide note in with someone dead in a GARBAGE CAN, I’m sure they did a bang-up job of making sure they didn’t leave fingerprints or leave other evidence at the scene.

This incident got me the thinking. If someone should ever murder Mrs. kkk or someone else I gave a damn about, and that person ended up some some bullshit sentence, would that mean I would get the same sentence or less if I killed that person? The world can be a fucked up place.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

February 13, 2010 at 3:49 am

Posted in News