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No telling what’s being thought of in the mind of a lunatic

Archive for March 12th, 2011

Ninja Fail

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Busted in the middle of the night? That’s a pretty shitty ninja.

A Scottdale man was charged with endangering the welfare of children after he was found dressed in black and “playing ninja” on a street while his child was at home alone.

Scottdale police said they saw a man in all-black clothing walking east on Fifth Avenue in 20-degree temperatures at 1:23 a.m. March 3.

Ross M. Hurst, 28, of 8 Fifth Ave. told police that he was out for a jog. In an affidavit of probable cause, Patrolman Joseph Lane observed dried mud on Hurst’s knee. Hurst said he had fallen, then said he had knelt in a field.

Hurst told police that he was acting out a fantasy of portraying a ninja, a Japanese martial arts expert employed for espionage and assassinations.

“I asked him why he was playing by himself, to which he replied that there are not a lot of people who want to play ninja,” Lane stated in an affidavit. “I advised him that it looked to me that he was doing something else. Hurst stated that he was not doing anything wrong and was going home.”

Lane found the story incredible and spoke with Hurst’s sister-in-law, who said he has a 4-year-old son. When police arrived at Hurst’s home, he told officers that the boy was sleeping.

“I asked him who watched him while he was out acting like a ninja, to which he stated his (Hurst’s) mother,” Lane stated.

When Lane asked for the woman’s name and number, Hurst refused to provide it. After officers checked on the son, they had Hurst’s sister-in-law contact the child’s mother to pick him up and called Children and Youth Services.

Police later contacted Hurst’s mother, who stated that she did not baby-sit her grandson that night.

Hurst has a preliminary hearing scheduled for 11 a.m. March 30.

Now that I’m older, I think back to when I was a youth and used to roam around in the middle of the night doing similar stupid shit like this. I also wonder how many times a car drove by me at 2 am, say my pisspoor attempt at hiding, laughed and just drove on by.

But wait. There’s more.

In a separate incident Tuesday, Hurst allegedly called a man who is a witness in a criminal case. He allegedly threatened the man and said he set up Michael Vivian, a friend of Hurst’s who is in the Westmoreland County Prison on charges of manufacturing, possession and delivery of a controlled substance.

“You know that skin around your neck?” Hurst said, according to the affidavit of probable cause filed by state police at Greensburg. “I hope you cherish it, because it’s gonna get cut.”

The witness’ wife told police that Hurst said her husband was a snitch and that he would kill everyone in her family.

Hurst was charged with intimidating a witness, two counts of terroristic threats and two counts of harassment with lewd and threatening language.

A preliminary hearing on those charges has been scheduled for 10:45 a.m. Wednesday.

I thought Ninjas were supposed to be on the hush-hush with their assassination attempts?

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Written by kkktookmybabyaway

March 12, 2011 at 9:22 pm

Posted in News