KK's Korner

No telling what’s being thought of in the mind of a lunatic

Archive for June 6th, 2011

Stink Bugs, Well, Stink

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OK, so for the last year or so these !@#$% stinkbugs have been showing up. This article gives a little history about these buggers.

Two comments:

1) It figures they first showed up in the eastern side of my commonwealth. All the trash seems to originate there.

Steve Jacobs, a Penn State University urban entomologist, says on his popular stink bug website that the Asian insect first was collected in the United States in 1998 in Allentown, Lehigh County, though he says it probably arrived earlier. It’s now spread to at least 37 counties but most likely exists statewide, and is found in many other states as well.

2) “Strong survival skills? Next to Democrats, these things are the dumbest creatures I have ever encountered.

It is almost as wide as it is long, has a piercing mouth that sucks juices from apples, peaches, tomatoes, green peppers, beans, squash, corn and other vegetables, along with soybeans. Sturdy and persistent with a strong survival instinct, it is named after its most notable weapon.

These things just sit there motionless until croaking, and if one gets flipped they are helpless. I’ve actually seen more than one walk on a smooth floor, trip over itself and end up on its back. And these things can FLY.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

June 6, 2011 at 10:47 pm

Posted in News

Suitable Punishment Not Confined To Death Penalty

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Oh boo-hoo. Maybe these shitheads shouldn’t have killed a prison guard.

Two US prisoners who have been held in solitary confinement for nearly 40 years should have their isolation ended immediately, Amnesty International said Tuesday.

Albert Woodfox, 64, and Herman Wallace, 69, have been held in solitary at Louisiana State Penitentiary ever since they were convicted of murdering a prison guard in 1972, the London-based human rights group said.

Their four-decade ordeal “is cruel and inhumane and a violation of the US’s obligations under international law,” said Guadalupe Marengo, Amnesty’s Americas deputy director.

This is why I’m not always a huge fan of the death penalty. Here’s the life of a security guard killer:

Amnesty said the men were confined to their cells, measuring two metres (6.5 feet) by three metres, for 23 hours a day, and have never been allowed to work or have access to education.

Good.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

June 6, 2011 at 8:39 pm

Posted in News

I Ate A Prune And I Liked It

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It’s been several years now and I have to come out of the closet with this announcement. I’ve been living a lie all this time and now I must come clean.

My name is kkktookmybabyaway, and I … eat prunes.

You heard me.

And I eat prunes because I like them. It’s not that I have any pooping problems or some other bowel-related issues (at least not with this particular instance).

My pro-prune philosophy wasn’t always this way. For years I avoided these disgusting-looking things like the plague. All slimey and gross. And then there was that stigma of only old people eating them. I don’t want no old-people food. I’m young and hip. I’m not going to break a hip. So for years I just pretended prunes didn’t exist — you know, like homeless people.

Then one day I was shopping with the better half and I came accross this package titled, “Pitted Plums.” I asked Mrs. kkk what these things were. She said they were prunes. I got confused, and then she added, “Prunes ARE plums, you idiot.”

Really?

I like plums.

So I decided what the hell and bought a small container of these things. And You know what? They weren’t half-bad. Ever since then I get the Sam’s Club 1000 lbs bag and proudly bring it along with me in the SUV-sized shopping cart as I go elsewhere in the story.

Well, OK. That last part was a bit of a lie. I try to have other products cover it up, but the casher always knows my secret.

So there you have it. Now the question I’m sure you are thinking right now is, “But do you drink prune juice?”

Let’s not get crazy now. Some things are going to have to wait until I’m in senior years.

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

June 6, 2011 at 4:25 pm

Posted in Life

A Deep Throat On Weiner?

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I’m posting this right now just so I can get this out there before the NY Post headline writers do.

Rep. Anthony’s Weiner (D-N.Y.) has scheduled a press conference for Monday at 4 p.m., presumably in response to a series of shirtless photos of the congressman posted on the conservative website BigGovernment.com this afternoon.

According to the site, the photos came from a woman who says the congressman sent them to her.

Weiner is coming off a tough week of dancing around questions about a photo of a man’s crotch that appeared on his Twitter account. He maintains he didn’t send the tweet, but could not say “with certitude” whether the photograph was of him.

I don’t know what Anthony’s Weiner’s press conference going on right now, but in case he’s resigning I want to post the folloiwng headline:

Weiner Pulls Out

Written by kkktookmybabyaway

June 6, 2011 at 4:06 pm

Posted in News