Idol-Flavored Kisses

This has clusterfuck written all over it.

It’s official: Randy Jackson, Steven Tyler and Jennifer Lopez are now American Idol judges.

Idol host Ryan Seacrest introduced the new lineup at a press conference Thursday held at the Forum in Los Angeles, where first-round auditions are being held.

Randy was the one holdover from the original panel of judges, which also included Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell.

I’m not an Idol viewer, but the better half is for some ungodly reason. We had a discussion abut this topic today, and here is what I said on the matter.

I have no clue how these judges will work as a team, but my guess is that Tyler and Jackson will be sympathetic while Lopez will play Simon’s role. In other words, Lopez will be the asshole of the group.

Problem is, I think, that people aren’t going to watch Lopez in this role and go, “ahahahaha — I can’t believe she just said that to that poor contestant.” They are going to watch her and go, “What a bitch.”

And while a contestant who tries to pull this off during an audition would never make the light of day on television…

…you just know news of this would get leaked out.

Vietnam Conflict, 2010 Style

Looks like those wascally tea-baggers are at it again with their race-baiting shenanigans.

Won’t those pointy-heads ever learn their place in society?

In an interview with Jorge Ramos, Univision’s anchorman, California congresswoman Loretta Sanchez, who replaced the great “B-1 Bob” Dornan, discusses the tough November election she faces.

At the 2:20 mark she states (and kudos to this blogger for doing the original translation as the interview is in Spanish):

“ … the Vietnamese and the Republicans are — with an intensity — trying to take away this seat, this seat that we [Democrats] have done so much for our community, take away this seat from us and give it to this Van Tran, who’s very anti-immigrant and very anti-Latino.”

Happy Times Were Here Back In July Of 2009

Say, the HUSSEIN RECESSION has been over since last June.

It turns out the HUSSEIN RECESSON ended more than a year ago.

Feeling better now?

The panel that determines the timing of recessions concluded Monday that this one ended — technically, anyway — in June 2009, and lasted 18 months. The duration makes it the longest since World War II.

It may be over, but you won’t be hearing any cheers from the millions of Americans who are struggling to find a job. Or are worried about the ones they have. Or have lost their homes. Or are behind on the mortgage. Blahblahblahblah.

Actually, if this thing ended six months into the Kenyan Koffee Fetcher’s regime, then why did we need that shit sandwich of a stimulus bill?

Sure I can attempt to be intellectually honest and say that jobs are usually the last thing to rebound from a recession. But after hearing about “jobless recoveries” and reading AP articles that cited historic lows in unemployment as “relatively low,” during the previous administration, why bother to be fair and balanced when I can just re-post stuff like this?

Shame it doesn’t include the “Summer of Recovery.”

University Academic Professional Pinhead

There are times when you read something and have a bunch of one-liners and witty comments just waiting to explode from your fingertips. This isn’t one of those times. The following is a letter to the editor regarding a military plane flyover at Saturday’s University of Illinois football game and the chanting of “USA” by some students. Nothing I could add to this can enhance its hilarity.

The vast majority of 9/11 observances in this country cannot be seen as politically neutral events. Implicit in their nature are the notions that lives lost at the World Trade Center are more valuable than lives lost in Afghanistan, Iraq, Palestine and elsewhere; that the motives of the 9/11 attackers had nothing to do with genuine grievances in the Islamic world regarding American imperialism; and that the U.S. has been justified in the subsequent killing of hundreds of thousands in so-called retaliation.

The observance at Saturday’s football game was no different. A moment of silence was followed by a military airplane flyover; in between, Block-I students chanted “USA, USA.” This was neither patriotism nor remembrance in any justifiable sense, but politicization, militarism, propaganda and bellicosity. The University is a public institution that encompasses the political views of all, not just the most (falsely) “patriotic.” Athletic planners should cease such exploitation for political purposes. They might at least consider how most Muslim students, American or otherwise, would respond to this nativist display; or better, Muslims and others that live their lives under the threat of our planes, drones and soldiers.

The overwhelmingly white, privileged, Block-I students should be ashamed of their obnoxious, fake-macho, chicken-hawk chant, while poverty-drafted members of their cohort fight and die in illegal and immoral wars for the control of oil. University administrators need to eliminate from all events such “patriotic” observances, which in this country cannot be separated from implicit justifications for state-sponsored killing.

David Green,

University Academic Professional

At first I figured this was a tenured professor. Someone else commented that “University Academic Professional” translates into “I work part time in the library.” Who’s right? Who cares. If this letter is legit and not some sort of prank, the guy’s a shitdick.

Actually, I’m still taken aback that a bunch of COLLEGE STUDENTS broke out into a “USA” chant.

kkk’s Rule Of Life #25

We should all be allowed to operate in a “Safe Mode” when the time calls for it … because I’m about ready to throw this piece of shit workplace computer out the window…